To help you make your life and relationships run more smoothly, the ability to compromise is a skill that can be learned. Even if the concept sometimes seems challenging to implement. Make your life a little easier for yourself and others. Here are some of advantages of compromising, as well as some tips for finding middle ground.
Four Good Reasons to Compromise
- Be objective try to see all sides. Making reasonable concessions paves the way for finding solutions to upsetting conflicts. For example, if you’re a parent with physical custody, be generous about accommodating your ex-spouse’s schedule so your kids grow up with two loving parents.
- Work Together. Teamwork flourishes in an atmosphere of trust and respect. By demonstrating your commitment to the common good, you make it easier to work together whether at home or at work.
- Strengthen all relationships. Growing our relationships is usually far more valuable than ‘winning’ on any particular decision. For example build good will by welcoming help in the kitchen even if you think it would be faster to do a task yourself.
- Feel happier. Our happiness depends more on the way we view life than on events themselves. You can practice accommodating others, without losing your own beliefs. You will find that becoming more flexible and generous makes you feel good.
Tips for Making Constructive Compromises:
Distinguish between compromising and copping out. Bullying can be very destructive for both parties. You can preserve your own integrity whilst setting healthy boundaries. You can still uphold your core values and needs whilst being firm and respectful about communicating your rights and desires.
Save your energy for the stuff that really matters. Are you focusing on the ‘small stuff’ instead of prioritising those issues that really need addressing? Let go and focus only on those situations that can take you forward towards your goals.
Gather facts. Try bolstering your position by doing the research to back it up. If your boss tends to resist change, he may be more receptive to approving a new employee benefit if you document how it saves money and improves employee retention.
Consider the other person’s position. When you’re asking someone to meet you halfway, try to put yourself in their shoes. Listen closely to their concerns and goals so that you can address them.
There is usually more than one option. We all attach different values to the same things. If you and your partner have different standards for house cleaning, you may be able to work things out by hiring a cleaning service.
Thank people if they make trade-offs. Acknowledge all concessions made and their contribution to creating more positive outcomes. Simply say thank you.
Stick to your promise. Think carefully before making a serious compromise so you’ll feel confident that you can live with it. Proceeding slowly is better than making promises you may later regret. On the other hand, your loved ones will usually be willing to rethink an arrangement if it’s undermining your wellbeing.
Take responsibility for your decision. Once the terms of any change are understood, be responsible for the choices you’ve made. This will help you to avoid becoming resentful.
Wield your power wisely. Even if you have the upper hand, it’s usually best to seek an agreement that’s acceptable to everyone involved. Future situations are likely to run more smoothly and you’ll enjoy more peace of mind.
Be open to both giving and taking, helps everyone to achieve more in the end.
Stay true to yourself while being open to making changes
that create better solutions in your private and public life.
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